DRAINED

Glorious May days are over and I've been spending our "long" holiday weekend (Ascension Day Thursday the 29th) doing absolutely nothing. Just sitting on my terrace gaping at the sky and the trees and the flowers and the birds, and only moving a few steps over to my garden hammock for the occasional power nap. After our house viewing on Sunday and Monday a week ago it was as if I became completely deflated, like every ounce of energy deserted my body and all that was left was an aching mass of fibres. I was drained both physically and mentally.

Preparing and styling the house for sale was such an all-absorbing effort, and when hardly anyone turned up at the viewings, after all the work I'd put into it, it was an awful anti-climax. The estate agent had no explanation - he used one word: "Coincidence." Well, coincidence or not, the fact remains that there were more than 3000 sales objects advertised for viewing last weekend and I think that might have had something to do with it. But we're optimistic, and the estate agent is still VERY optimistic, so we'll be doing another round of adverts and viewings in two weeks. I thought I might tempt the agent with a free stay at our house in France, amid fantastic golf courses both in France and Spain (I know he plays golf) if he manages to obtain a good price for us. Or is this classified as bribery?

I celebrated my birthday on the 21st, with a spontaneous mid-week party where I was surrounded by family and friends. I was surprised and pleased that so many of them turned up at such short notice, and they all brought me gifts of wine and flowers. Nothing better, and as my friend Grete said: "What you don't need now are new THINGS to ruin your recently acquired minimalistic house style!"

My husband, my daughter Sophie and I got a take-out birthday lunch of sushi and maki and ate it outside on the terrace. Afterwards I laid the tables "al fresco" for the evening, and no sooner had I done that than it started pouring with rain. So outside again to remove cushions and tablecloths and cutlery, then the rain stopped - and so on, three or four times. The weather on your birthday reflects what you've been like all year, and my husband was quick to point out that it was a tiny bit unstable and whimsical… Well, in the end it settled down and we were able to enjoy an evening outdoors - as is usual on my birthday!

My granddaughter Mira said at the end of the evening, just before she was going home, that she had something to show me - my present. The above drawing is of her grandmother and grandfather, when we were young. He asks: "Do you want to marry me?" She whispers (small writing means whisper): "Yes." Mira explained to me that she is very disappointed in the real story of my husband's popping of the question, and she wanted to create a new version. Here everything is right, sunny meadow with flowers, heart floating above us - love is definitely in the air! The real story: Me (on the phone from Oslo to Hannover, Germany, where he was attending a trade fair): "I'm pregnant." Him: "We'd better get married then." I agree with Mira - this was much too unromantic! I'm glad she set things right! But the wedding was wonderful. And so were the next 31 years. 

Then I said to her: "Do you know how old Mimmi is today?" "Of course," she answered, "You're fifty-nine. But you seem more like you're forty-eight." No wonder I love this girl1

My husband is still eating well! Everyone comments that he's putting on weight and how healthy he looks now. A lovely surprise from Australia came in the post the other day - Josh's (the bridegroom-to-be) Dad had decided that his new Norwegian mate needed some Oz input and sent him a sweatshirt and a T-shirt. Perfect! He's been wearing them since. I already love my new Australian relatives! 

And I love my French leather sandals and my crazy French dress!

But we know that the future is uncertain. Tomorrow there's a new appointment for a brain scan, then the result presented for us at the clinic on the 18th June. The wait in between these dates is almost unbearable. I think this is what really gets me the most - the strain of living without knowing AT ALL what hides around the next bend. As I've said before - nobody knows what the future holds in store - but we - in our present situation - less than anyone.